‘Freeballing’ according to UrbanDictionary.com is defined as “Going without undershorts, said of a male, so called because his balls hang free and unencumbered. A similar expression is “going commando,” which can be used of either a male or female without underwear, but is more often used of a male.”
Ignore the attempts to sound like a 16th century parliamentarian and understand that it just means not wearing any underwear.
Maybe you’re thinking about experimenting, maybe it’s your first time going to the gym or maybe you’re a woman and while ‘freeballing’ sounds like a disgusting term you just wanted to see what it was about anyway. Trust me, if you are part of the latter, you’re either going to be very disappointed or incredibly disappointed.
Here are some reasons to not do this:
Exhibitionism
Just thinking of the possible positions you’ll be in at the gym. Leg press, quad curls or literally any seated position in front of a mirror can take you from innocent gym-goer to the Sex Offender’s List in a matter of moments.
If you’re really looking to show your junk off to someone at the gym, perhaps think about introducing yourself first? If something as simple as tying your shoe could make for a possible disaster. Just as well, 20 minutes on a Stair Master may seem innocent to you, but for anyone facing your direction 20 minutes equals a lifetime of emotional scars.
My God, the Chaffing
A more medical (maybe?) reason to not go undergarment-free at the gym is because it helps to absorb sweat in unsightly areas.
If you plan on running or moving around a lot any sort of friction or rubbing on the inner thighs can cause an itchy, painful chaffing that can result in a sweaty rash.
The last thing you want is a verbal “ow” every time you take a step forward. Unless you’re a fan of the wide-legged walk usually reserved for cowboys after a long ride.
The Pain, the Pain of it All
A great reason to wear boxer-briefs at the gym, or really any time is to save yourself from some painful experiences.
Ladies, if you didn’t know, not wearing underwear and simply moving at a reasonable pace up or down a set of stairs can be an alarmingly painful ordeal.
There’s flipping, there’s flopping and it all results in a painful smacking sensation. I don’t even want to imagine running on a treadmill during these conditions.
The Odours & More
Last but certainly not least, and I’ll try not to be graphic, sweating for a man or a woman at the gym in certain areas can result in sweaty smells. These delightful scents are amplified when they are in creased, covered and porous areas.
Do yourself and everyone around you a favour and provide a protective layer of absorption for the sweat and accompanying smells to avoid becoming that person that is avoided by other persons.
If ‘freeballing’ was on your bucket list, then I’m afraid myself and everyone else who is trying to stay in shape would like to kindly borrow your bucket to vomit in.
